I'm not sure what's going on with me right now; I'm always tired and I can't eat.
finally back to my blog after all the postings + changing blogskins of mrvy and e464's blog. its been days since i last posted and am wondering if anyone's looking forward to this post. all am i the only one reading it. wellwell, anyway on friday went out to jp bought some stuffs and homed. did card till 4am, slept and woke up at 8am. 4 hours of sleep. woke melissa, yuxin, kahmeng up. prepared and off to cellgroup. late like superrr, thanks to yuxin! :) but hahas.. cellgroup was super fun! happy birthday all december babies! which includes yuxin, adora, lingli, joelle, gerald, jerald, candice, weihui. i seriously hope i didnt miss out anyone. lol! had fun with cherlyn as usual. played many games during cg, fun like ever. its always fun having them around (; bused to tamp and i seriously dislike my stomach. off to expo for service. like usual, my stomach was problematic. feel like vomitting all the way and i keep complaining to yuxin. guess she finds me irritating now. wahahahs, service was awesome like ever. after service took pictures. and collecting cgf was sooo funny and the envelope tore and waiting for yz and discuss about monday and yz was done and off to changi airport t3 for fellowship! wakakaka, i think i 'and' too much. okay stop, my noodle sucks ttm, idk what they did to it. it taste like some kind of very very bitter medicine. zomg, let them try and they go o-m-g. hahahahaha! washed it and ate, homed at 10.45pm. (; reached home, use lappy and drop dead immediately. pathetic me slept for only 4 hours and survived throughout the day, so happy. superwoman of the day wahahahs. been reading tumblrs many many this few days.. and its seriously making me emo. im trying my very best not to think of you, trying my best not to care, not to see. i can't, sad to say yet im failing. can't you just tell me whats wrong. i want to know what you're thinking. whatever shit you put me in, im feeling so hard right now. bull shit, thanks for acting like you care. so much for my happy ending. dont know why did everything turned out this way. it might be me letting you in to mess up my life. how much i wish i could not live. im feeling terrible without you. you promised we'd me okay, you lied.
okay, stop of all this crap, its killing me and im dying. cellgroup dinner tml. prayermeeting starts tml. melissa's chalet up next. this whole month is packed with stuffs. i need to rest. im getting so tired easily nowadays. i can't eat i feel like puking. well, its all because of you. forget it forget it. livewire unplugged on thursday and cellgroup on friday. service on saturday and iris baby's coming along with me. happy :) cellgroup outing on the 18th, yuxin's birthday on the 19th, christmas services, and gone 2009. i can't deny this, but im afraid. afraid of moving on to the new beginning. cant face this ending, unless you're with me. but whatever bullshit, this year ended too quickly. i'd miss everything. but bye.
lesson learnt today: i can't hold back my tears forever.
